Opinion: Light of my life

Commentary by Dick Wolfsie

Baby Boomers don’t trust technology. When Microsoft Word asks if I “want to save the changes?” before I close a document, I often want to do exactly that, but can I be sure that the people at Microsoft Word can be taken at their word and my changes will be saved? I want a BIG, SOLID commitment, not a puny, micro-soft one.

I also don’t trust the dome light in my car. I get out of the car and stare at it until it finally dims. I feel a little ashamed, because I am sure that millions of dollars of research went into this technology. Why couldn’t they have spent all that cash on a way to stop stuff from falling between the seats?

Does the dome light stay on for a while even during the day, which means I could walk away not knowing if it’s gone off? If there’s one chance in a million that light will stay on all afternoon, I’m not leaving the car.

I should be taking advantage of this technology instead of squandering my life waiting for it to go out. Let’s see: once a night (30 seconds) for 20 years, I’ve stared at my car’s interior. That’s 219,000 seconds, or 60 hours of my life wasted. That’s 40 naps I’ve missed out on.

Related to this, I’d like to know how to politely inform folks they have exited their car without turning off their headlights. People used to say, “Oh, thanks. I sure didn’t want a dead battery.” Then they started saying, “Thanks, but they go off automatically.” Lately I get a lot of: “Relax, Grandpa. When’s the last time you bought a car?”

Well, it’s nearly sunset and I’m off to bed early, so I asked my iPhone to wake me at 5 a.m. and then I set my clock-radio for 5:05 a.m. as a back-up. But I’ll never fall asleep, anyway … wondering if that porch light is gonna go on.

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